i need to focus. i have fucking exams on the 4th and the 5th. gosh, if i could just focus. there are lots of things i've been thinking recently. actually, these things just boil down into this one major problem that for some reason, i could not get off of my head. i want to tell this to the persons concerned, but no, it's something i need to solve on my own. all these years, i've learned to suffer in silence. and why can't i this time?
but i've realized that this decision i've made was something that i will soon regret in the long run. i need to tell someone about this, or else. have you ever gotten the feeling that you need to say what you feel for the sake that you've said it to someone apart from your self? this is exactly what i'm feeling. i don't care if they won't understand me. all i want is to just let it out.
death is easier. life is harder.
- bella swan
how true.
About
- Finella
- hi. i'm finella. i like a lot of things and i think i like to feel. i also enjoy taking long walks, and watching dolphins&other sea creatures, and going to museums, and being with a few people, and eating mexican/indian food. the usual stuff—art, music, books, russia, trains, airports, philosophy, psychology, and literature— intrigue me. i'm an engineering student (MS soon to be PhD) and i don't feel like one. and i think that's okay as long as i stay true to myself. i am very idealistic, but at times, like right now, i don't feel like one because i am an enfp. my only dream is to have a constant happy disposition. that's very idealistic and i'm quite pessimistic so i don't know.