hurling trees

there are a lot of traits i value in a friend but the one that will always weigh the heaviest is loyalty. i feel safe when i know that i have someone i can lean on in times of need, who will always stick with me and accept the shadows of my past. not so long ago i have bumped into people who appear to me as friends, and i do appreciate the blessing. but sometimes i just don't think that i'm not yet ready to let people in until i know for sure that they are sure of me.so i keep close to my heart the few people who i know will always side with me, who won't disappear when the moment calls for reassurance and fathomless strength. realized now that there is actually only one, and her words and presence have shaped me to the most fitting and prudent form i can become.

sitting against the concrete floor outside the department, i instantly remembered what i felt was lacking in me these past few months-- time. i separate this dimension into two ways: time for myself and time for others. last year, i barely have time for what constitutes as a social happening; too busy with my novels as the world shriveled and pruned back atomistically. i feel relevant as i live among the wonders of citegazze, view saturday with filled teacups under my nose, and wrote down words of affirmation and negation on my palms. these are my worlds and my people.

i feel an insatiable need to read my novels again. i've barely touched the covers of my new acquisitions and i feel the pull of the bed instead of the attractive forces these books possess. therefore i am losing and by this, i mean that i am a hyped product about to be discontinued.

so cheers as i tell myself to be good and stay intact